Its been a while (again), so let me try to make it up to ya’ll.

I’m still laying low for now. Feeling a little better, but I’m still consumed with anxiety about not receiving treatment and waiting for this flippin’ scan. The scan is now scheduled for early August. It seems so far away. I’m not sure if its my imagination, but all I seem to hear about is other people’s recurrence of cancer...and it keeps me up at night.

On the flip-side, I’ve received a plethora of emails over the past couple weeks. I think the grapevine has expanded since the big event (Rock Against Lymphoma) is generating more buzz. It is so touching to hear that people are thinking/praying for me. And everyone should know that I do read all of the emails...and I will respond to everybody, it just takes some time.

Publicity for the event is really gaining momentum. I was interviewed on the radio this past Wednesday (it will be aired at 6 am this Sunday 6/11 on 104.5 FM WXLO - you can stream it online at www.wxlo.com). I know thats pretty early for a Sunday, but I’m going to see about recording it and possibly posting it here. I have some other upcoming media appearances that I’ll let you know about. I’m way famous.

There’s been some blurbs in local papers about the event, and I’ve gotten quite a boost in website traffic...and I am very happy to share my experience and feelings.

But I do want to make one thing clear:

If you (or somebody you know) have been diagnosed with cancer, please don’t view this site as a timeline for what you should expect. I’ve had some rough speed bumps through this thing, and fortunately this doesn’t happen to everyone. I can tell you that you will most likely experience the range of emotions (fear, anxiety, anger) - but know that there is such a thing as “life with cancer.” I remember feeling that I would not see the next day when they gave me my diagnosis. Don’t spend any time or energy focusing on statistics or probabilities. Know that people do survive, and then they move on. Its either 100% or 0% for you.

If you know somebody that is going through this, please pass on the love and support that so many have given me. I cannot tell you how much it helps. I might have secluded myself a little bit during the course of my treatment, but the love, prayers, and support that I’ve received was never ignored and always appreciated. It gives you a kick in the rear, and inspires you to continue the fight.

I really cannot wait for this event. I’ve received so many emails from people saying that they are planning on attending. So many people that I haven’t seen in so long, its going to be great!

And speaking of emails, I’d like to share a sound-bite from one that I received yesterday. I think it really speaks well to how I’ve been feeling. Its from a woman who actually was diagnosed with exactly the same cancer I was (Non-Hodgkins Diffuse B-Cell Lymphoma). She ended the relatively same treatment schedule I had in 1998, and had a daughter in 2003. I hope she doesn’t mind me “borrowing” her words - but like I said, it describes my feelings so well:
 
“The thing I remember most about the time while I was in treatment and the months after was the feeling like I was on the fringe of reality..only popping in and out but not really feeling like I had a life of my own …certainly not a life of work and friends and fun like before cancer.  But now that time has passed, I try really hard to be normal and most times I think I pull it off………I hope the same for you as you start to feel better.”

Thanks.

And I should probably put some pictures of Dante on here...now that he’s getting so big!